A Remedy for Boredom!
By Istar Schwager, Ph.D.
Encourage your kids to explore their interests and create their own fun.
With all the talk of over-scheduling, it seems odd that any child today would claim to be bored. But when they finally have some unstructured time, a lot of kids are at loose ends during summer vacation. Accustomed to adult-directed after-school programs and time-consuming homework, many kids have difficulty recognizing their own interests, initiating their own projects, and coming up with their own activities. It's not surprising, since they often have little experience discovering what they truly love to do and creating their own fun.
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When I was young and complained that I had "nothing to do," my mother, a French teacher, was quick to point out that the French phrase for "I'm bored" is "je m'ennuie," which means "I bore myself." Throwing my boredom back in my lap was unsettling, but it left a lasting impression. I, like all bored kids, wanted to be rescued with a new toy, a field trip, or some other external distraction. Since my busy mother didn't oblige, I was left to fend for myself. This helped me discover that I liked to read and draw.
As a parent, I sometimes followed my mom's lead. When I refused to keep my son occupied, he and his friends designed maps of imaginary countries, sold their outgrown toys in the playground, formulated an original concoction for melon juice, and created their own interview show using an old super-8 movie camera.
Parents can play a role in helping kids discover their own interests and express those interests through engaging activities. Most kids have a clear passion for something—be it pets, baseball statistics, singing, cooking, biking, party planning, or building things. Many hobbies evolve over time. Summer is a great time for kids to explore their enthusiasms. It's freeing that they aren't being tested or graded on their free-time activities. While all kids need some downtime to just "chill," school-age kids are often happiest when they're engaged in a project with a goal they've defined.
Need help knowing how to steer kids in their own directions? Here are some suggestions.
Give your child room to explore a variety of interests.
Dinosaurs? Decorating? Space travel? Guitar playing? Poetry? Juggling? Insects? Observe what your child loves to explore instead of pushing your own agenda. What makes him smile? What gets her energized? Encourage your kids to learn more about what interests them—and don't disparage their passions, even if they strike you as odd.
Help kids find age-appropriate ways of exploring interests.
"Age-appropriate" is key here. When expectations are unrealistic—for instance, pushing your child to turn his fascination with insects into a Nobel-Prize project—kids are quickly discouraged. Do help your kids gather materials and find resources on the Web or at the local library. Help when needed. But investing in expensive equipment or turning an activity into your project can send kids running in the opposite direction.
Support kids as they develop their own plans and strategies.
The kid who is happiest working in the kitchen may decide to set up a baked-goods and lemonade stand; the pet lover might create ads and business cards to open his own dog-grooming business for neighborhood dogs; the child who loves to draw could create a backyard art show and invite other kids to add their artwork to the show. Make suggestions and offer help when needed, but encourage kids to plan the specifics on their own.
Be a role model for productive activities.
Seeing you garden, collect stamps, or volunteer are all ways that kids discover how to translate interests into activities. Share your enthusiasm for the activities you like. Don't assume that your interests are automatically going to be your child's, though they may turn out to be. Kids can learn valuable skills by helping you with your projects. What also rubs off are attitudes about being engaged and productive—a sure-fire way to beat those summertime "I'm bored" blues.