The holding hands icon represents caring. For content about raising a caring child, look for this icon.

How to Raise a Caring Kid

Highlights 4Cs

Curious, Creative, Caring, and Confident™
The light bulb icon represents curiosity. For content about raising a curious child, look for this icon.
The paint brush icon represents creativity. For content about raising a creative child, look for this icon.
The holding hands icon represents caring. For content about raising a caring child, look for this icon.
The thumbs up icon represents confidence. For content about raising a confident child, look for this icon.
Caring matters. It matters on the playground, in the classroom, and at home. Caring helps children and the adults in their lives to be happy, safe, and cared for. It allows children to know and understand that they can push boundaries, try harder, and become their best selves.
boys walking arm in arm

A primary—if not the primary—concern of children is to find care, attention, and meaning in relationships. The connection between two people who care for each other is incredibly powerful. Supporting the bond between parent and child and the bond between child and child is integral.

Research—and firsthand experiences—tell us that children are inherently caring. Babies and toddlers may cry when someone is sad and share their stuffed animals as consolation. Preschoolers show caring through kind words and thoughtful gestures. Elementary school children readily understand and show caring, and they also realize the power of words, tone of voice, and kind—or unkind—actions.

What kids need is to see bright possibilities and people treating one another with care and acting with integrity, the basis for emotional wholeness. And children need to see parents model this caring behavior.

You’re probably already demonstrating to your child how you care. How many times have we, as parents, asked our child, “Are you OK?” after a skinned knee, making sure we say this while looking at our child, and gently touching her knee to comfort her. These actions that we consider second nature are what our children see and what they learn from. The caring question, the soft tone, the compassionate touch. We show kindness and concern in these moments, and our children are watching.

See Also: 10 Tips to Foster Caring

Children can also learn from stories what it means to be caring. Characters can exemplify caring behavior by making the right choices. They can do what a child thinks he should do or would want to do, without putting him in the situation itself. Similarly, kids can also learn how it feels to act unkindly or be made to feel bad, without taking personal emotional risks. When children read books or are read to, they can explore ideas in safe spaces.

Caring isn’t always about responding to pain or sadness. Caring can also mean strengthening what we excel at. Relationships grow strong when kids can interact and work together. A shared game or activity encourages bonding and connections. When you need two to succeed or accomplish a task, caring for each other becomes integral.  

What parents need to help kids discover is that relationships are a source of joy worth caring for. Conflict can be resolved and connections maintained through kindness and careful thinking, and by showing respect for both self and others. It’s often the kind word or caring act that people remember. We often recall more strongly how someone made us feel, rather than what they did.

The kindness that children learn at home carries over to their school lives and how they care for others the rest of their lives. When children feel cared for, know they treat others well, and can trust themselves and those around them, they can become their best selves.

Hidden Pictures Favorites 2-Book Set