“Resist the urge to label your child. Don’t just announce, ‘Jake’s just shy.’ It casts him in a role that may be hard for him to climb out of. And don’t force him to interact if he’s uncomfortable. Let him observe and join in when he’s ready.”—Ms. King “Don’t convey your anxiety to your child, who may see your reaction as a sign of disapproval. If you have one child who is shy and another who is outgoing, don’t make comparisons or put undue pressure on the more reserved sibling—and don’t overschedule a shy child.”—Dr. Levine

“First, help your child connect with peers. Invite another child for an outing that allows the children to interact without pressure, with a trip to a playground, a movie, or making cookies. Most children do well when they have something to do. Second, give your child a way to ease into social situations. For example, before you walk into a party, you might say, ‘When we get in there, do you want to give the present to the birthday girl first—or do you want to start bowling?’ Third, if others ask, ‘What’s wrong with Adam?’, just say, ‘Don’t worry. Adam will join you when he’s ready.’ This puts the child in charge.”—Ms. King “It can be helpful for parents to be open about their own experience with shyness and explain how they overcame it. By acknowledging that being shy is common, then the child feels that it’s not just them. Kids watch you and how you interact. You can say ‘These situations are hard for me, too, but this is how I deal with it.“—Dr. Davis-Kean

“Try activities that focus on talent rather than personality. Team sports may work because they encourage interaction, but individual sports like tennis and golf are good, too. Also, music can be a good option for children who don’t have extroverted personalities. The social entrance point is that the children share a skill or interest.”—Dr. Davis-Kean “Shy kids may prefer activities in which they are surrounded by other kids but don’t have to do much talking—art, cooking, building a cave with couch pillows, making a marble run out of cardboard tubes and tape, apple picking, collecting acorns in the backyard for no reason at all—in short, any engaging activity in which the kids can work together for a common cause.”—Ms. King